I like that people come over to my house and say, “It’s so welcoming, cozy and warm here. It’s like instant valium just by walking through your door.”
In all honesty, I do try to keep the Chalet as cozy and relaxing as possible … for me!! But it really does make me feel good knowing that others like to come over and visit me for the same reasons. It is important for me, physically-mentally-emotionally, to decrease the amount of tension that can sometimes lie stagnant in the air, especially this time of year. And in my humble opinion, atmosphere is everything!! I try to create a haven ... a setting that is devoid of pain spiking circumstances. And most of my friends and family respect that … and seek me out because of it.
It’s not as if I’m Nostradamus, Ann Landers, the Dali Lama, and Betty Ford reincarnated and raised by Dr. Ruth, it’s just that I have a unique perspective of life. And most people know this about me. So when they need advice, or help, or a slap upside the head, or just some encouragement, they know that they can always come to me. I deal with a lot on a daily basis just from my RSD alone. The pain ... the emotional swings ... the frustration of not being as independent as I want to be ... it completely depress me, so it does me good to get out of my own head to help others … and it doesn’t hurt my karma either!! Besides, I can live vicariously through their antics without having to personally experience the negative aftermath that inevitably follows poor decisions. And yes, there are even times when I learn from what others experience. I find a way to adapt that knowledge into my life. See?? Ever-morphing!!
I despise drama but I know how to deal with it … not that I like to, but I know how. I can help to calm down anxieties and get people to work through their drama … when I’m asked. I’ve been told that I’m a good listener and have a sympathetic ear. I am also told that the rational and unbiased counseling that I have to offer is 'priceless'. Now I don’t know about that last one, but I have survived a whole heap and learned a ton of lessons in the process ... and I’m more than willing to share what I’ve learned. I will always keep learning and sharing until the day I die ... it's just who I am. I do not offer this ‘counseling’ without permission, though. Not everyone is ready to fix their own problem … sad but true fact. I do not have the power, nor would I even want, to fix anyone, but I do have the innate ability to help people fix themselves … they just have to be willing to listen and make the necessary changes to be happy again. Seeing someone turn their life and karma around for the better is 'priceless' to me. I really do get a kick out of it!!
However, I do not enjoy nor do I appreciate when someone else spends my stored energy and intrudes upon my Pollyanna attitude with the same friggin woe-is-me BS every single time. There is always something positive that can be said about any situation. You just have to be willing to find it!! What really chaps my arse is when someone uses me and/or my generosity for their own selfish gains … or just to listen to the sound of their own voice while they bitch and try to twist truths to their own advantage. Whether they want to steal my soul or my meager, but needed, possessions: they seek me out for help; cry on my shoulder; rant and vent while I sit quietly and listen, internalizing their stresses; taking only what they want from me and then they just walk out … leaving their poo on my doorstep. I don’t mind helping someone work through their own poo from time to time, but the ones that do it habitually are finding themselves more cut off from me than ever, these days. It’s sad because it’s the Christmas season. The season of giving and sharing and loving. But I have had to draw a line for my own well being. In my opinion, there is only one occasion for which it is ok to be selfish, and that is when I am protecting myself physically, mentally and/or emotionally. I practice Verbal Regurgitation with 2 dear friends and put my faith in the fact that I am my sole, earthly protector. And <sigh> because of this, the Chalet will forever remain my haven!!!
It's difficult, yet reassuring, to believe in karma ... but I have faith that I will continue to be of assistance to anyone who asks and is ready and willing to fix their own karma and happiness. I also have faith that I will forgive the abusers, but even etch-a-sketch brain can’t cause me to forget about being used. I'm a lot smarter than some people think!! ;)
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