There comes a time in every dog's life when their human decides to go soul searching. This last weekend was my time. Mommie made lists. A lot of lists. When all was said and done, it ended up being six notebook pages, front and back, of pros, cons, and lists. (When I sniffed the kitchen trash this morning, I found her used up notebook underneath her first round of coffee grounds.) The best part of the weekend, for me, was when Mommie would tear out a page, crinkle it all up, and throw it ... until she opted for a trash bag instead of my retrieval efforts ... I smelled that bag in the trash too. <sigh> ... it was fun while it lasted.
Mommie has decided that it is in both of our best interests if we: continue growing our own food; continue to spearhead her physical therapy; grow our own herbs; not get cable tv during football season; stick to raising awareness for RSD and not focus on on raising money; create a fan page on Facebook for me; finish our book; take more short walks together; start looking for a new couch/sofa-surfboard; remove all mouse turds; and just remain the Dynamic Duo. I have no idea what any of this has to do with searching her soul, but it all sounds good to these pointy, floppy ears.
As she explained it, these things will make our lives cheaper and easier. Really Mommie, that's all you've got? Cheaper and easier? The word "elaborate" comes to mind here. And then she did just that (she's convinced that the only reason that she got a dog in the first place was so that she didn't look crazy when she talked to herself out loud). Ok, here's the breakdown:
She said that if we grow our own food and herbs, it will be cheaper than always having to go to the store and to the herbologist. As summer ends and the weather gets cooler and it becomes more difficult for her to get out of the house, it will make it easier and less stressful when she runs out of something. So we are going to build a make-shift greenhouse with all sorts of veggies and roots in it. This should go well ... oi vey!!
The whole physical therapy thing boils down to a swimsuit, or lack thereof. She was contemplating going back to the therapy pool at the hospital and then transferring over to the YMCA to continue PT on her own. The RSD in her right leg is causing the muscles to shorten and warm water therapy is the best when it comes to elongating those muscles, but that means that she would have to buy a swimsuit and that's not in our budget. I think it's because she thinks that no one wants to see her 43 year old, skinny butt in something as revealing as a swimsuit ... but I digress. So we will take more short walks around the block followed by me helping her with her stretches and more baths ... for her, not me!!
Next ... she already has a game plan in tact for football season, so there is no need to shovel out more dollars on cable tv. We do just fine with Hulu, Netflix, and the 5 local networks. Day games at Auntie ColoAngel's house, night games at the GingerBar, and "bad day" games at the Castle where Mommie's parents live. My Mommie is so smart ... she only goes where there's good food. I taught her that!!
Something that causes my Mommie a hell-a-ton of stress is having to ask for money ... for any reason. She swallows her pride often enough to ask her parents for help, but when it comes to raising money for a cause, she just can't do it without feeling like a "humiliated ass," as she calls it. Her line of thinking is that if she can't afford to donate, what gives her the right to ask for other human's hard earned cash ... answer: not a damn thing!! So she will continue to focus our efforts on raising awareness for RSD. We'll leave the fundraising to the rich people that can afford it!!
Mommie wants a new couch that also converts into a sofa surfboard. The couch that we have now is so comfy, I just don't understand why she wants a new one!! Oh wait ... never mind ... I do know why. The couch that we have now is a woven red fabric/mohair (my hair) blend. No matter how often Mommie vacuums it, it just takes one Happy Nappy from me to reupholster it. I can see how that would be nerve-racking for her. And we need to be kind to her nerves. Let the search begin!!
This morning, finally ... after weeks of procrastinating, Mommie created my Facebook Fan Page, Kiva's Korner. All for me!!! I get to tattle on her, make jokes about her, post pictures of myself, and maybe even learn to write my own meme's. This leads straight into the need to finish the book that Mommie and I are writing together. Hopefully we can make enough money with it to afford trips so that we can include "The Adventures Of..." to my page. Mommie wants to travel Route 66 with me ... just think of all of the stories that I could tell about that adventure!!
The last bit of soul searching that Mommie did was to realize that she can no longer ask a guy, any guy, to take us on in a relationship. She doesn't want to risk someone else caring about her and being forced to sit and watch and feel helpless when she has a flare or needs to recover. She sees the looks on their faces and she might as well have just asked them for money, because the "humiliated ass" feeling comes back and clobbers her over the head with a 2x4. It's not to fair to ask anyone to have to witness how pathetic she gets, and it's not fair to her to see them miserable because of her. So we will remain the Dynamic Duo with some stellar friends, an amazing family, and (Mommie says) batteries. (I don't get that last one, maybe you humans will.)
I have faith that Mommie and I will do what we need to do for us!! I have faith that I will back her up on her PT and protect her while she flares and recovers. I have faith that Mommie won't try to make me eat the veggies and herbs as we grow them (thank God). I have faith that we will find a new couch before winter hits. As much as I love the vacuum (no really, I do) I know that it hurts Mommie every time she has to drag it out and use it. Now, I'm gonna go search the world wide doggie web for meme's for my wall ... tee hee ... this is gonna be fun!! Peace out, humans!!
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