Looking Back ... Looking Ahead

Tomorrow my Mom and I will venture east with the Munchkins.  It has been a wonderful week with them and I know they will be back later this summer.  However, it's been a week for loss around here, but those Munchkins have really helped with distractions!!  We will travel halfway and the Bombshell will meet us.  This will be about a 10 hour trip for Mom and me so I need to make sure that I'm as prepared as I can be.  Mom got a new car with leather seats.  I hate leather seats.  I slide around them and bounce off the edges like a pinball.  So I'll be taking pillows to keep me from sliding and a blanket to protect me from the A/C.  I'll have my K-spray and meds as well as a box of kleenex and a couple bottles of water for the ride home.  Mom and I are always a wreck when we have to say goodbye.  Well, Mom's a wreck.  And when Mom's a wreck, Jenn's a wreck.  Someday we'll convince the Bombshell and the B-I-L to move closer ... it could happen.  Until then, I will be the duct tape that holds Mom together.

On Friday my RSD will be old enough to drink alcohol, I'm not saying that I will be consuming the crap, I'm just saying that it will be of age.  21 years ... Wow!!  I honestly don't remember what it is like to not be in pain.  Sad, huh?  But true.  I have lived through years of PT, OT, psychological therapy, massage therapy, acupuncture, acupressure, chiropractor treatments, years spent in bed, years spent passing out in my mashed potatoes, not being able to drive, not being able to ride in a car for long distances, relationships, break ups, non-RSD related health issues, getting drunk to forget, getting sober to remember, finding a modicum of balance, moving, packing, unpacking, relearning how to navigate stairs, relearning how to use my arms, legs, and fingers, having my liver blow up (metaphorically, of course) and gaining over 60 pounds, and then losing that 60 lbs, (i'm still trying to find balance with my weight, but I'm getting closer).  None of it was easy!!  But it has all been worth it to live the kind of independent life that I lead today.  Yes, I still have to rest and veg a lot, but I know how to manage my spoons.  I save them for the things that I have to do and I hoard them for the things that I want to do.  I learned how to do physical therapy tricks in my own home, incorporating them with my daily tasks.

After 21 years, I have experienced quite a bit with my RSD.  And although my memory of a pain-free life eludes me, I am desperately trying to make the best out of the cards that I've been dealt.  I don't remember asking for RSD, but my road has made me a tough cookie ... as well as a mature thinker.  Common sense goes a long way with RSD, and I will continue to listen to my body and adjust my life accordingly.  To those that have stayed the course with me over all these years (that would be my family), I thank you from the bottom of my heart!!  To those that have come into my life recently and and stayed and have made a point to learn more about RSD because of me, I love you!!  To those that have come and gone, I thank you too.  You have helped to make me a stronger individual that is more focused than ever in raising awareness.  

I have faith that I will continue to do the next right thing for me.  I have faith that my attempts to raise awareness will kindle a spark in the masses to do more to help us RSDers.  I have faith that I will rebound quickly from this leather seated road trip tomorrow.  And I have faith that I will reestablish a daily routine that is both beneficial and  productive.  I'm a survivor.  It's what I do.  Now ... about that cure...  

Click here to join my FU RSD day on Friday, June 1, 2012 ... aptly renamed FUR'RSDday!!  https://www.facebook.com/events/279720672122191/