The Plights of the Parents

I need a friggin magic wand!!  NO child should ever have to be in this much pain, and no parent should ever have to watch helplessly as their child suffers!!!  And no child should have to watch a parent suffer because of them!!!  This is not the natural course of life … THIS is RSD!!  20 years of dealing with the beast has taught me a lot about myself and my family.  It has shown me how strong I can be in the face of adversity, but it also proves to me, time and again, that I can still crumble into a blubbering pile of poop at the face of my mother when she sees me in pain.  I may be an almost 43 year old adult, but I am still her child.  However,  I contracted RSD as an adult and I was a total tomboy growing up.  My mom’s biggest concern for me, back in the day, was whether or not we had enough Band-Aids, Bactine, and calamine lotion in the medicine cabinet, not when the next ketamine infusion was scheduled and could we make it that long!!

I look at moms like the Warrior Mama and my Godsister and all I can do is shake my head!!  We are the same age-ish and all I know is feeling pain, just like their daughters; and all they know is what it looks like … and the looks of RSD are depressing, heartbreaking, gut-wrenching, stymie-ing, and, at times, awe-inspiring.  And because their children are still at home, (duh!!  they’re kids) the only thing these moms have to look at is the depressing crap!!  So what do we, the “children” with RSD do??  We learn how to act, how to wear a mask of happiness, and how to lie.  I, for one, never tell my mom how bad I really do hurt on most days … but I don’t live with my mom, so she’s not forced to see it, therefore I get away with my lies and half-truths.

On the flip-side, I look at my friends with healthy kids and think to myself, “you people had better thank your effin lucky stars that your kid is still able to play sports, go to school, run, jump, climb, ride comfortably in a car, eat, start modeling, go to birthday and holiday parties … all without fear of repercussion!!”  Don’t get me wrong, I am grateful for every healthy child out there and I am a cheerleader to no end for *ALL* kids.  But I can’t help but compare these families in my head.  RSD needs awareness NOW!!  RSD needs YOU!!  These kids need YOU!!  These parents need to know that normy parents are willing to empathize with their plight and are also willing to help ease the stress of having a child with chronic pain.

Now here’s the deal, never once have I ever asked for sympathy.  Just the opposite, in fact.  When someone starts spewing sympathetic rhetoric, I walk away.  I have to.  They don’t know!!  They think they’re being helpful by showing sympathy but in reality, they’re making us feel worse, physically and emotionally, with all of their “oh you poor thing” or “I feel terrible for you” or “I wish I could make it go away” or “I wish I could help you!” You know what, SO. DO. WE!!  But, in the words of my mother, “if wishes were horses, we’d all take a ride.”  (her own version of acceptance) ...  and I’m pretty sure that every RSDer, regardless of age, will agree with me … we don't want or need your pity!!!  We want and need you to make a difference!!

So to all of you normies out there that have uttered these words, here is your chance to help me, the Penguin, the Godniece, and the 5 million other RSDers!!
SUPPORT THE 2nd ANNUAL CRAZY SOCK DAY on January 24!!!  1 week from TODAY!!!

While out shopping for your own crazy socks to wear on January 24, 2012, purchase an extra pair or 2!!  Send Laurie (the Warrior Mama) or Jenn (me) a picture(s) of the un-worn socks along with the size and value.  (lad4587@gmail.com or havefaith_91@yahoo.com)  Spirit Sparkplugs will host an online auction for all of them and forward you the winning bidder’s information so that you can send the socks directly to the winner.  This will cost you the price of the socks and shipping.  The proceeds for this auction will go Spirit Sparkplugs in the Penguin’s name.  The auction will close at the end of January 2012.

For more information about the non-profit organization, Spirit Sparkplugs, visit www.spiritsparkplugs.com.  They are committed to helping children who face medical difficulties of all kinds around the world.

I still have faith that RSD awareness will be raised, but sometimes even my faith falters and I need to be reminded of why I fight.  Having the normy people that love me and care about me the most stand beside me, and fight with me is just the boost I need to feel right now.  Don’t tell me, SHOW me!!  Please!!!