About 6-ish months ago or so, ColoAngel invited the Red One and I to become members of a private Facebook group of Denver Bronco's fans, which, for the blog, we'll call the "Knuckleheads." We talk about all things Bronco and sometimes life in general, when one of us is feeling down, but for the most part it's all Bronco banter!! The members span the entire country from Florida and New York to California, and Montana to Oklahoma and Texas, but the majority of us live right here in CO. Anyway, we finally had a meet and greet with about 20 of us at a Denver restaurant on Saturday. Knuckleheads came in from Montana, Washington, and the western slope. We basked in the glow that is Mrs. Barrelman!! Yes, Mrs. Barrelman is a Knucklehead too and she showed up with all sorts of photo albums and swag!! (I came home with bumperstickers, coasters, and a Shannon Sharpe trading card. She is, hands down, the sweetest woman I have ever met!!) She also invited us all to join her for tailgating before the game on Sunday. Almost everyone at the table, including the Red One, had tickets for the game. There were only 2 of us that weren't going, me (because it was December and who knew that it was going to be warm enough for me to be outside) and Otis, a childhood friend of another Knucklehead. The GM of the restaurant had heard us talking about the game, saw me pouting when the rest were making plans, walked over and told me that he knew of 2 south stands tickets going for face value ... $80!!! Otis' friend heard the conversation and offered up the other ticket to Otis. I had hoped to either be able to take Houdini or my Porno Dealer (they know how to handle me and my RSD in crowds, and they are both huge Bronco fans as well) but it was too late and I was not about to miss an actual Denver Bronco divisional championship game, are you kidding me??? Otis seemed like a nice enough cat, mellow, covered in facial hair, and a Bronco fan. The plan was that I would be the DD to and from Denver with the Red One and her friend from work and I would meet Otis and the GM's brother (he had the tickets) at the south stands gate. OMG I was going to the Bronco's game!!!!
Sunday ... I donned my cat suit, a pair of jeans, crazy socks, a long sleeved t-shirt, and my Champ Bailey jersey. I tied a warm hoodie around my waist, put on my walking tennies, grabbed my cripple stick (cane) and I picked up the girls and headed to the Mecca!! Mile High!! (It isn't the same as the old Mile High, that was the real Mecca, but it's a close 2nd!!) After about 2 miles of walking we found Mrs Barrelman and the rest of the Knuckleheads, minus Otis and his friend. We hung out, we took pictures, we chanted, they were drinking beer, wine, and orange margaritas made in an orange chainsaw blender. I drank Pepsi. I was to meet Otis and the GM's brother at 1:30, so at about 1:10 I had to start cripple-walking my way up the hill. As I was handing the brother my money (borrowed from Houdini and my parents) Otis stumbled up reeking of beer. Not even knowing this clown's last name, I had to talk him through getting out his wallet to pay for his ticket. We got inside the gate and made our way up the ramp to the 2nd level. As we were walking up the ramp, he tried to make me jump on his back. (Yeah, there's a genius idea!! Let's put a woman who's already in intense pain on a drunk's back and make them go uphill!!) I stopped to buy a Coke and when Otis tried to buy a beer, he was denied. Yes, I laughed ... openly. Up we went to the southeast side of the JumboTron ... to the very last row!! The Red One and her coworker had seats on the west side, ColoAngel, her dad, and a few Knuckleheads were on the northwest side, Mrs Barrelman was on the northeast side, and the rest of the Knuckleheads were on the southwest side, right above the tunnel where the players come running out.
Now here's where the story gets awkward, at no time, and in no fashion, was this ever a date. But that didn't stop Otis, and I thwarted his every advance. Every time he so much as tried to touch me, he got his hand slapped. Six different times he asked me, "So what's your story?" Five times he asked me, "Why the cane?" I kept reminding myself that I never had to see him again and that I was at a Bronco's game!!! I told myself that this was a test as to how I could handle myself in a large crowd with no one to lean on or assist me, if I should need it. With 4 minutes left in the game, Otis decided to go down to the restroom ... and never came back!! To say the least, I was relieved!! The other fans around me laughed when I leaned back in my seat and said, "Oh thank God!!" They thought it was a date too but, in no uncertain terms and with all of the humor I could muster, I set them straight. The gentlemen that were sitting on the other side of Otis walked down the steps with me after the game, calling me a "good sport" and saying "true Broncoholic beats an alcoholic any day of the week." The Red One and I had already worked out where we would meet after the game, so after a "quick" stop at the restroom, I headed down the ramp ... solo!!!
I have faith that I will never put myself in that kind of situation again!! I have faith that Champ, PFM, and the boys will continue to amaze us throughout the playoffs!! I have faith that, should the situation present itself, I can absolutely handle myself in a crowd, with my held high, smiling through the pain and anxiety. I got to go to a Denver Bronco divisional title football game in December!!!!!!!! And I have RSD!!!!!! Those kinds of amazing things just don't happen every day!! I have faith that I will lie on my couch like a lump of poop for the rest of the week, because after I damned the pain, it damned me back. But I can writhe and cry with visions of greatness in my memory!! I saw PFM play football with my own eyes!!!!
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